for everything which is yes

i thank you

for this amazing day:
for the leaping greenly
spirits of trees
and the blue true dream of sky;

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and for everything
which is natural
which is infinite
which is yes

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e. e. cummings

folded and unfolded and unfolding, i am

If there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s exactly this –

To live genuinely to myself,
Authentic to the moment,
And to allow all things to flow organically.

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everything is waiting on the other side of fear

Hopeful and hopeless.

Today’s harsh realities leave so many people feeling hopeless. We are easily convinced that we have hit a dead end, or that the things we care about are only fleeting. And, when we are particularly struggling, we think that our difficult situation will never end.

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And yet, we have no control of the earth’s winds or the hands of time. Big and small miracles occur in our daily lives. To believe otherwise empties ourselves of hope, and we fall victim to fear.

We must remember to expect good, rather than anticipate disappointment. It is the power of positive thinking at work, with a pinch of gratitude and the zest of faith. The plans for each of our lives are bigger and more beautiful than we can dream. Maintaining hope, especially in the midst of uncertainty, is what keeps us on the right path and makes our days worthwhile.

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if people were rain, i was a drizzle and she was a hurricane

The thing that makes you exceptional,
if you are at all,
is inevitably that which must also makes you
lonely.

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Hansberry

gimme gimme never gets

Inside is a fiery thirst for progress that is unbending and insatiable. There is no disentangling progression from perfection, and both are always just a little out of reach. There is no negotiating. If I allow an inch, I would take a mile.

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There is a repulsion of anything that resembles narcissism and indulgence, dependence and weakness. Until even the gestures for self-assurance seem… wrong. I sweep up all the crumbs of courage and self-love. My quest to be the least consuming has made me the ultimate consumer of myself. There can always be more, faster, harder.

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Wanting more comes naturally to us humans, whether is it money or status or stuff. In fact, this drive for progress has led to our major advancements and accomplishments as a species. But, always wanting more means never having enough and never being satisfied. It’s really that simple.

I want everyone to find dignity in their vulnerabilities, and be satisfied from the inside out. I want to learn to be more gentle and content with myself.

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Alex