give back your heart, to itself

The time will come
When, with elation,
You will greet yourself arriving
At your own door, in your own mirror,
And each will smile at the other’s welcome.

And say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine.
Give bread.
Give back your heart
To itself, to the stranger who has loved you

All your life, whom you ignored
For another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

The photographs, the desperate notes,
Peel your image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.
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Derek Walcott.

one foot in sea, one on shore

Love,

It will not betray you
Dismiss you, or
Enslave you.

It will set you free.

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one for me, one for you

Opening and giving to others is a movement that starts and ends within.

In order to offer our love to others, we need to first give to ourselves. Does that sound paradoxical? It’s not. The amount you can give is directly proportionate to the capacity of what you are.

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When we pause for a moment in stillness, we become instantly more self-aware. Oh, there you are. We are present and able to see clearly the most important character in our lives – ourselves. Our “selfs.” Are we really paying enough attention to this person?

Taking good care of yourself seems easy, right? You just do it. Of course. How simple. Except it’s not. Because until you actually accept and understand who your “self” is, it’s pretty hard to actually love it. We do this by simply being present with ourselves. Discovering our needs and filling them, just by asking, “what is it that I need right now?” Taking our time, taking what we need. Offering basic compassion. Nourishment.

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When we are filled with self love and approval, we are better able to give. What’s more is that we can give from an authentic and meaningful place. We can continue thirsting to offer more of ourselves, but without internal neglect, mindlessness or deprivation. We can channel our motives for avoiding focus on ourselves and learn that we can give not to fill a void. That void is filled with peace and love from within, not without.

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wage love, spread peace

The judge. The critic. The timekeeper. The doubter. The persecutor.

Hearing it.

And then, opening the heart instead. Feeling the fear, breathing into it and just opening even more anyways. Self compassion.

Who could be more deserving of your unconditional love and support than yourself?

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thanksgiving ii

wildheart

To practice gratitude means more to me than counting my blessings at night before I fall asleep.

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You cannot selectively numb feelings. You cannot decide to shut some of them out without blocking everything altogether in the process. Joy. Connection. Comfort. It’s easy to learn how to know things – anyone can do that. But you cannot be taught how to feel.

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In those moments of true feeling, I am grateful.

I am being nobody else in a world trying its hardest to make me everybody-but-me. In those moments of fear and vulnerability, when I wonder if I can really love this fiercely? Believe in this so passionately?

To stop and just say instead: I am so grateful. Because to feel this vulnerable means that I’m alive.

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